'It is hard to walk away from my husband...'

Dear Diana,
I am 36 with two kids. My husband doesn't care for me, but after all this time I am finding it hard to break free and move on. I don't know how I will survive as living alone will be tough with the school going children. I know nobody will want me. I am clinging onto a relationship in which there is nothing left. I am well aware that there is another woman in his life. Though he claims she helps him in his business, this is far from the truth. I want to move on, but I don't want to end the marriage. At times, I feel I should not care about what he does as long as he pays the bills. At other times, I feel he is cheating on me and having a good time with this other woman. I am confused.
— Tanushree
Illustration/Amit Bandre
Illustration/Amit Bandre 

Dear Tanushree,
First of all you need to clear your muddled mind and decide what you want to do. It is time you take control of your life. Either you walk out on him or come to terms with the situation. If you choose the former option, you live separately or seek a divorce. Either way he will have to care for you and the kids. If you choose the latter option, then there is no point in constantly complaining and cribbing about the state of affairs. You will then have to shut himself from your life, and live the way you want to. You have to make the choice. Right now you are only thinking and moaning about what went wrong in the marriage. You seem to be in the mood for self-pity. Find a friend or a family member to pour your heart out to lessen the pain. Or be strong and lead your life the way you want to. You never know, in the future you might meet someone who understands you better.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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