'My ex-boyfriend is back in my married life...'

Jun 03, 2014, 06:01 IST | Dear Diana

Dear Diana,
I am 27 and got married last year. I had been in a relationship with a guy for four years, but things didn't work out and I agreed to an arranged marriage. My husband treats me well and I know I can trust him with anything. Recently, I bumped into my ex and he acted as if everything was OK between us. He took my number and he keeps calling me to catch up with him. I don't know what to say to him to avoid unnecessary problems.
— Hemalata

Dear Diana 

Dear Hemalata,
You accidentally bumped into your ex and the two of you were civil to each other. That's how two mature people should behave. At the same time the encounter can be anxiety-producing as you feel awkward . Whatever may have been the reason for your breakup, meeting an ex-lover is a cause of worry. If he is calling you and telling you to meet up with him, you should refrain as one thing can lead to another. Remember he is now your past so let him remain there.

Dear Diana,
I'm 33 and I recently split from a long-term relationship with a woman I've known for more than a decade. And then she went on to lose her mother. Now I'm feeling guilty because she's going through a rough phase and I don't know how to fill in to help her cope with the pain. At the same time, I don't want to appear like I'm making an effort to get back with her. I don't want to take advantage of her vulnerable position either.
— Furhan

Dear Furhan,
You have decided to move on, but are still keeping tabs on what she is up to. Paying a condolence visit is fine, but do not get into a position where you become her shoulder to cry on. You do not want to be with her, so why even think in those terms?

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at diana@mid-day.com, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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