'I'm her teacher but I can't wait to be with her'

16 June,2017 06:00 AM IST |  Mumbai  |  Dr Love

I am in love with one of my students. There is an age gap of 8 years between us. We have been friends for the past 2 years. I proposed to her a year ago and she accepted...


I am in love with one of my students. There is an age gap of 8 years between us. We have been friends for the past 2 years. I proposed to her a year ago and she accepted, but wants to focus on her studies first. I want to focus on my career too. She sometimes asks me to move on if I want to, instead of waiting for her, and doesn't want to meet me now. This is the first time for both of us, so I don't really know what to do. Last week though, she admitted to her best friend that she wanted to be with me. We chat sometimes, and fight too. I love this girl and respect her a lot, but I just can't bear this distance. - Vinay K
This is tricky not because of the age gap - people in their 60s have been known to marry 20-year-olds, after all - but because of the relationship between teacher and student. I don't know if you teach her at an institution or coaching class, but I suppose this is between two consenting adults, so I ought to step off my high horse for a while. It all boils down to how much the two of you want to be together, really. If education and careers are a priority right now, why not discuss how you can move forward at some point in the future, and what expectations you have from each other? There's no point bickering about how things are if you don't try and arrive at a solution that makes you both happy. And if you can't find one, the sooner you both choose the move on, the easier this will be to deal with.

I delete all photographs of my girlfriend on my phone after a few months because they take up space. She thinks I'm being uncaring. What do I do?
Transfer the photographs to a folder on your laptop and invite her to look at the folder every two weeks.

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