'I have a girlfriend, but I still think of him'

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am 23 years old and I am dealing with a fairly confusing situation. My best friend and I live in a hostel room together. We had sex once, and we both accepted that it was a mistake. On account of that incident, we don't speak to each other anymore, even though I'm sure we both want to. I have a girlfriend and I love her a lot, but I can't forget my best friend. I think about him constantly though, day and night. What can I do to forget him?
- Suraj S

Why do you want to forget him just because the two of you had a few moments of intimacy? It's perfectly normal to have a physical relationship with people, irrespective of their gender, because that's how people explore aspects of their sexuality. If he finds it uncomfortable, send him a message to tell him you're okay with it. If he's embarrassed about it, tell him you won't mention it again. If he's your best friend, why do you want to give him up and lose him over something that millions of people have probably considered at some point in their lives and never gone ahead with? It's okay to have feelings for anyone, despite what some political parties in India say.

I believe my life partner should enjoy the same kind of movies I do. My friends don't understand this, but I am a huge movie buff and can't imagine being with someone who doesn't enjoy watching the same kind of films I do. How will we go through life without shared habits? Am I being unreasonable? My parents are finding it difficult to find me a girl with the same likes, which is why I have been single for a long time. Should I compromise on my beliefs and marry someone they choose or wait until that special person comes along?
I think you should stay single. This can only be good for the women.