22 July,2010 07:10 AM IST | | Dear Diana
Dear Diana,
I am a 24-year-old girl. I have been in love with a guy for two years now. Our relationship is going through a rough patch, though.u00a0 I have a very close friend who has been with me since before I met my boyfriend and I enjoy his company... a lot.
u00a0
Initially, my boyfriend did not like my proximity to my friend, so I never told him that I talked to my friend. When, in fact, we'd talk for five hours every night. Somehow, my boyfriend always found out and we'd fight a lot because of this.
He hated it that I would lie to him but I had no choice as I couldn't stop talking to my friend. We broke up once because of my friend and I had even promised my guy that I talk to my friend a lot lesser. When he does call up, I feel that I am not doing anything wrong, leading to more problems with my boyfriend.
I don't want to lose either of them, so how can I keep both of them happy ? I don't want to lose my friend. BTW, my friend doesn't know that I have a boyfriend and I can't tell him because he's close to my family and I have a feeling he might tell them everything.
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
You are doing nothing wrong by talking to your friend. And if your boyfriend can't get that into his thick skull, you're better off without him. Also, you have to make time for both ufffd and in such a way that the time you spend talking to either is equal.
u00a0
One shouldn't feel neglected at the cost of the other. And if you are going to make promises, you had better keep them. Don't expect your boyfriend (who caught you the first time around) to be ignorant of the continued conversations, this time around.
u00a0
Also, is your friend trying to be something "more" in your life? If you can't trust him with keeping a secret, there's a lot more going on in his head, that you aren't aware of.
What is true love?
Dear Diana,
I am an 18-year-old girl and I want to know what is true love. How do I know what I am feeling for a guy is love or simply attraction? Can you please help?
Sonal
Dear Sonal,
True love is when you meet someone who you would do anything for, and he wants to do the same for you. It's an intense feeling.
Rather scary at first. Sex does not determine if you love someone. It can be purely physical, but it can also be a great gift and sharing of love with someone special.
I suspect she's cheating on me!
Dear Diana,
I have been dating her for about a year and I really love her and she is perfectu00a0 for me. But I think she is cheating on me with her ex, who is also her neighbour.
They remained friends after they split, but in the last three months she has been getting closer to him. She calls him often andu00a0 because they live close by, she sees him all the time.
u00a0
I live far from her and I don't get to see her a lot. Also she tells me she is busy so she can spend time with him. She says "I love you" to him which is wrong.
I admit I am a possessive person as I have been cheated on before numerous times. My query is: Should I be concerned?
Nishant
Dear Nishant,
You seem like a really nice and a trusting fella. Of course you should be concerned. It does seem like she is two-timing you.
u00a0
At the very least cheating on you emotionally! I don't think I'd bother discussing this with her. By her actions she has made her decision obvious.
u00a0
You make yours. You shouldn't put up with this, my friend. No woman who cares about her boyfriend would subject him to this.
It's not about trusting her or being jealous. It's about what is acceptable and unacceptable in a relationship and what she is doing is NOT acceptable.
Get out while you can. No matter how much you love this girl, she doesn't seem right for you.
