Is it right for me to take the initiative all the time?

I work in a reputed MNC. Two months back, I proposed to a friend of mine who also works in the same company.

Is it right for me to take the initiative all the time?

Dear Diana,

Illustration/ Sameer Pawar

I work in a reputed MNC. Two months back, I proposed to a friend of mine who also works in the same company. She rejected it citing family pressures. When my friend messaged her asking her the reason for her rejection, she told him that it was because the two us knew nothing about each other. I'm troubledu2026 why did she not tell me this? Why did she lie to me? Now, when I work abroad, it is only I who takes the initiative to chat up. She never does. She said she knows I love her. Is she playing with my feelings? Is it right for me to take the initiative every time?

Asif

Dear Asif,
Why should she take the initiative? She never proposed to you. You proposed to her. You might be friends, but she's under no compulsion to accept your proposal. Maybe she didn't feel comfortable telling you that "she knows nothing about you" at all, and what she probably means by that is that while she knows you as a friend, there's absolutely nothing she knows about you beyondu00a0 that. How you treat the women in your life? Besides you're far away. You'll have to have a heart-to-heart with her once you return. If you feel she's wasting your time, stop pursuing her.

She says we're just good friends

Dear Diana,
I'm a 17-year-old. I am attracted to an 18-year-old. We met through Orkut. I proposed to her but she said we're just good friends. We met up but only for a few minutes. I asked her if she had any boyfriends. She said she didn't. Should I continue in the relationship with her?

Janak

Dear Janak,
Whatwere you expecting her to say. She barely knows you. Get to know her better and then pop the question. Tell her you love her when you're sure that you are in love with her. And what 'relationship' are you talking about? A friendship is not the same as making an acquaintance.

I'm scared of proposing to her

Dear Diana,
I am 22 years old, she is 30. I want to marry her. We are good friends. I am scared of the thought of proposing to her. What should I do?

Amar

Dear Amar,
She's eight years older than you are. Tackling opposition from your parents may be a sticky issue. First, get them on your side. Tell them to consider the possibility that you might marry an older woman and observe their reactions. Thereafter, if they agree, approach her and keep it simple and yet add a touch of romanticism. Take her out on a date. Shower her with more attention and affection than you normally would. She'll figure out soon enough. Then, pop the question. Although, I do wonder... are you ready for the pressures of a married life this early on?