29 March,2010 10:19 AM IST | | Diana
Dear Diana,
I've been married for almost 11 years now and on the weekend of my birthday we rented a resort and invited some friends to celebrate. Well, when he fell asleep, something told me to check his phone and I did. That's when I found out! I had my suspicions since December but no proof.
He was constantly texting a lot. When I asked him who he was texting he would name all of his male friends and his sister. He made me feel so guilty that I believed him. This went on until this month when I found out. He told me that it only lasted two weeks.
When I checked our phone accounts I found otherwise. He didn't sleep with her but the fact that he was giving her the attention I needed and told him about, hurts! He says he's sorry for hurting me. I love him despite all that. I told him we would work things out but it hurts a lot. I try not to think about it but any little thing triggers it... What do I do?
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
A lie is a lie by any other name. The fact that he made you feel guilty about your instincts should tell you something. They might not have had sex but it was wrong of him either way to do this to you. He knew the girl wasn't in it for anything permanent as was he, but a fling, however platonic, hurts! Take some time off, away from him and get your thoughts together before you decide how to deal with the situation.
A threesome to spice up sex life?
Dear Diana,
I'm 22. My husband and I have been together for three years and our sex life is getting boring. I thought about a threesome but I don't think he would go for it. In any case, how does one go about that! Any advice on how to spice up our sex lifewould be very helpful. Thank you.
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
If you need a threesome to make things exciting in the bedroom,u00a0 it has less to with boredom than anything else. A threesome, alongwith being unfamiliar territory to you, isu00a0 advised against. It never ends well and leaves two of the three partners untrustful of the other. Try different things that don't involve a third sexual partner.
Too young for love?
Dear Diana,
He makes me smile, laugh, and love my life even when I'm down. He is different than the other guys I know. My only concern is if I'm too young to be in love with him. To start off, I'm 17 and he is 20. I knew even before we started dating, it was going to be serious. He tells me he loves me so much and I'm the love of his life, he's stopped looking ever since he found me. I'm just afraid we're rushing it. We've been dating for about five months no, by the way.
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
If I were you I'd just have fun. If you find yourself falling for him as well, good. If not, enjoy what you have and see what comes of it. Only you know how you feel. Nobody can tell you what's real or not. It's love. Just enjoy it the way it is. Don't try to rush it. Just go with it.
You sound as if you know your boundaries. And if you are smart that way just get to know him better day by day and love him. Are you too young? I wouldn't say so. You know where to draw the line, you know what you want from a relationship, you know your own mind. That ought to count for something.
