Dr Love with Mid-Day: Scared that we will drift apart

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My girlfriend and I have spent more time apart than we have been together, because we live in different cities and are still trying to find a way to be together more often. We will manage to do this at some point but, until we can, I worry that we may drift apart because of how difficult it is. We talk a lot, but it's not the same as being in the same place and spending time together. Is there anything we can do to strengthen our relationship so this temporary situation doesn't cause long-term damage that neither of us can foresee yet?
You can focus on the pillars of any relationship, which are love, trust, mutual respect, and open lines of communication. Treating this like a long-distance relationship will allow you both to acknowledge what the challenges are and come up with ways to make it easier to manage. This isn't easy, of course, but it is not impossible either if you can both keep the big picture in mind and constantly remind each other of what you are working towards. Talk about how you're feeling, why you're worried, and what you want to do to make sure your bond stays strong, and this shouldn't be an insurmountable problem.

I feel as if my privacy is being invaded by my boyfriend, who wants to know everything about my personal life and feels as if I am being unreasonable if I tell him I'm not comfortable with some things. I want to draw boundaries but don't know how to without alienating him. Please help.
The sooner you put your foot down, the easier it will be for you to establish boundaries. Putting it off will only encourage your partner to ask for more, which will inadvertently lead to resentment or even a breakdown in communication. If he wants this to work, you will have to be open about what this is doing to you and why you need more space.

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