Dr Love with Mid-Day: Should I keep trying to date her?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 24-year-old guy and am madly in love with a girl who doesn't take me seriously. She knows how I feel about her because I have asked her out a number of times, but she never agrees because she doesn't think of me as anything other than a friend. I have tried to explain that my feelings are real and that I just want a chance to show her what I'm really like, but she is adamant that a date will not happen. Is it worth it for me to keep trying or should I distance myself and hope that she changes her mind after a while? What should I do?
You should take what she says seriously and avoid assuming anything other than what is presented to you. She has been very clear about her intentions as well as her feelings towards you. To be hopeful and wait for a change of heart is your prerogative, but that may never happen and you should be prepared for that too. Staying away may seem like a great idea, but it also reveals a certain immaturity on your part because you're putting out a message about your inability to accept someone's point of view. If you value this person in your life, and want to stay friends, it may be healthier to focus on that rather than try and hope for something else to happen.

My husband spends more time with friends than with me. He says it's part of his personality, but I feel as if it's a sign that this marriage isn't strong enough. What do I tell him?
You should tell him exactly what you think because he owes it to you to change. He has made a commitment and should be called out if he isn't doing what is necessary to make this marriage work. If he doesn't take it seriously, your future with him may not be that secure.

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