He blocked me over our differing views

Published: Sep 14, 2019, 06:08 IST | DR Love

I would like to still have him as a friend, but don't want to constantly apologise either

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dr LoveA college classmate of mine started to chat with me on Facebook a few months ago. We communicated a lot, and he eventually told me he would like to be a friend. I said I would like that too, and we began discussing all kinds of things including our personal lives. A few weeks ago, we had a conversation about politics, and I said something he didn't like. He didn't react at first, but I found out later that he had blocked me. It was a shock, because I didn't expect that sort of a reaction for what I thought was a trivial conversation. I don't know if I should apologise. I would like to still have him as a friend, but don't want to constantly apologise either. What should I do?

I think you're right about not reaching out because genuine friendship is based on acceptance. It's about being able to be with someone even if they have opposing points of view and finding common ground. It's about agreeing to disagree, because that is what adults do. If this guy can't handle a different perspective and wants to be friends only with people who share his opinions about everything, he isn't the kind of person you can expect any support from. You're better off without him in your life. Stick to what you believe in.

My boyfriend has been really distant with me lately and doesn't tell me what has happened to change his behaviour. I have apologised, not knowing what I am apologising for, but he hasn't stopped being cold towards me.

If he doesn't communicate and tell you how he feels, there isn't much you can do about this. All you can do is tell him that your relationship won't get stronger until he learns to be more open and forthcoming. Without that exchange of information, he needs to understand that the two of you may not have a future together.

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