How do I find out if my boyfriend is cheating on me?
Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
A few weeks ago, a friend casually said she thought she saw my boyfriend with another woman at a mall. When I asked him about this, he says he was at work, but my friend wouldn't lie about this. Is he cheating on me?
This boils down to trust, because they may both be right. Either way, I suggest you look for more plausible signs before assuming he is cheating on you.
My girlfriend and I have been together for four years. We have a great time together and go out often but, over the past six months or so, it has started to feel a little forced. I'm sure we love each other, but I am beginning to suspect we love each other like old friends who know each other well, rather than people who want to spend the rest of their lives together. We had a conversation about this, too, and she agreed. When I suggested we try harder to revive the spark, she said it may make sense to end this for a while instead. I don't know if this is a good idea, because I think it implies she wants to date other people and see how that goes. My fear is, if she does that, our relationship may never really recover. What should I do?
Are you assuming she wants to date other people, or did she explicitly say that? Getting some sort of clarity always helps before jumping to conclusions. Tell her your fears and allow her to explain why she thinks this is a good idea. Don't dismiss it simply because you assume things will change forever. It is a valid cause for concern, of course, and relationships don't always survive these breaks, but you and your girlfriend will have to arrive at some idea of the larger picture, and what you both hope or want this relationship to be a few years from now. If she doesn't see this future at all, you may not have a choice but to call it quits.
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