A girl became my friend on a social networking site to get information about one of my pals with whom she had a breakup
Illustration/Amit Bandre
Dear Diana,
A girl became my friend on a social networking site to get information about one of my pals with whom she had a breakup. We used to flirt, but she took it seriously. Later, she forgot about her ex and proposed to me. I declined and decided to distance myself from her. Turns out she hasn't given up on me yet. I don't know how to deal with her anymore. She keeps sending messages to me.
— Satya
Illustration/Amit Bandre
Dear Satya,
You have got yourself in a soup and you are to blame. Initially you became her pal to help her overcome her ex. But this woman mistook it for love. Or may be because you did a bit of flirting with her, she felt you were in love with her. You need to tell her clearly that you are not interested in her. You felt that as she was in a vulnerable situation, you
could take advantage and do a bit of flirting. You need to tell her clearly that you were only helping her out and not interested in having a relationship with her.
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Dear Diana,
I'm 23 and live with my friend in Mumbai. She's my favourite person on the planet. I think I'm in love with her. She doesn't know that I'm a lesbian. And I'm sure she's straight. However, I can't bring myself to accept this fact and keep fantasising a future that involves the both of us. I'm sure it's an unacceptable bet, but I want to take a chance with her by letting her know what I really feel about. But at the same time, I don't want to harm our friendship.
— Salina
Dear Salina,
If she is a close buddy, how come she does not know about your leanings? Or perhaps you have hidden this aspect of your life from her. This means you are not a true pal like she is. Tell her the truth, if she is mature she will know how to handle it, but if she is not, it might strain the friendship. But it is better you be honest about your feelings for her.