It's graveyard shift and she's ravenous

Apr 13, 2012, 11:19 IST | Kumar Saurav

Who hasn't fantasised pleasuring incredibly sexy and excited vampires, and defeating the dirtiest devil around?

Their eerie guise is something worth dying for. While many have confessed having sex with ghosts (yes, a Google would tell you more), you might not get a chance to share the bed with a 'soul'mate. Not to worry. Even your bedroom can turn into a ghoul garden, replete with sins at their sensual best. If all this reads too weird to make sense, embark on the dark wilds ahead. 

Vampire voyeur

Horror is hot. List out some movies to match your mood, at least for evening starters. The Lair of the White Worm, Count Dracula and Daughters of Darkness are some of the evergreens. Make sure the eerie-erotic feeling gets manifested in real life seduction. Use strawberry pulp and sauce sachets for blood and red contact lenses for effect. Better still, be his cruel countess and dress the house in total darkness when he steps in. Pounce like a pucca vampire, and before he knows it, you'd be devouring him dirty. The idea, really, is to kill. Touch not, bite. Grab not, claw. Likewise, men, too can surprise their ladies with black capes, some foundation, well-gelled hair, pointed boots et al. Tattoos aren't a bad idea either. But make sure you've hinted some sort of a surprise beforehand, lest one of you ends up with a heart attack!


Representational picture

Hello Halloween
You've been there, done most of it. Tried new positions, used dotted, flavoured, ribbed and vibrating condoms, gone crazy on the terrace, in the bathtub, under the stairs, on the motorcycle and yawn, you think nothing's quite left. Wrong. There are some secrets you've perhaps never unraveled. Like your scariest, sexiest self. Organise a special Halloween party for your partner the very day you please, and when he/she shocked with all that gore, show him/her some more!

Wear wolf
There's a reason why they say black and red are the sexiest hues one can don. Add the drama bring on that saucy scarlet lipstick, bold black nail enamel just about everything you can get your hands on. Lingerie, earrings, belts, whips, watches, capes, caps, skull motifs: Floor them with fear. And then, get as ruthless as it gets. PS: Remember to not rip apart the skin, though!

Choose the right haunt
A red tint in a spook nook at home sets the story in the right background, but make sure the kids are out. Satin sheets, vintage knick knacks and a CD playing hyena-style humming will prove great accompaniments. Just in case you want to move out, zero in on an abandoned factory or construction site. Chase her from corner to corner as she runs for her life, gets tired, falls on your knees and says, "I surrender." Hope you guys don't have to do that to the police, though! 

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