My mother-in-law is a monster

Aug 03, 2012, 06:32 IST | Dear Diana

Dear Diana, I have been married for six years. My hubby is very arrogant and criticises me for everything. His mother is a big influence on him and I have to take everything lying down.

His mother has come to live with us since the time my son was born over a year ago. This has made things even worse for me as she gives him a daily update about me every evening when he returns from office. I don’t know how to cope with this any longer. I am a housewife so the whole day I have to bear her tantrums.
— Sulochana

Illustration/ Satish Acharya

Dear Sulochana,
Only your hubby can deal with his mother and try to knock sense into her. You can explain your predicament to him but at the same time remember you have to respect her — she is his mom. This however does not mean you have to accept abuse. You are a housewife so now after a year, you are capable of taking care of your kid alone. You don’t need help at hand. So perhaps your ma-in-law can return to her home. But remember this is a difficult question to broach. First explain it to your hubby. Tell him you do not want to raise a child in such a negative environment. Changing her will be a tough proposition but antagonising her further will only worsen things for you. Why don’t you meanwhile stop reacting to whatever she says? When she realises that there is no reaction, she might just stop her verbal volleys. Try it, it might just work.

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