My folks are against him

Dear Diana,
I am 29-year-old divorcee. I am in love with a guy who is 34 and has two kids. He too loves me. We both work in the same place and belong to the same caste. We want to marry but my parents and relatives are against it. He is nice guy. He told me everything about his life. I love this man and feel we will be happy together. Am I going the right way or not? What should I do? I am already frustrated with my first marriage, so now I don't want any more problems.

Name withheld

Dear Friend
Don't rush into anything. Your parents have your best interest in mind. How long have you known this guy? Have you met seen him in his surroundings? At his home? With his children? With his friends? What do people at work think about him? Since you've already have a bad marriage behind you, it's more important for you to be very very sure of what you are getting into this time. Take your time. Get to know this new guy very well. Tell your parents that you understand their fears and that you want to give them to know your new friend. Let them spend time together. Maybe they'll get to know him and like him.

Illustration/Satish Acharya

I want an amicable parting

Dear Diana,
I have initiated divorce proceedings against my husband. I was advised legally that there has to be no specific reason fordivorce. My parents support my decision. Ours was a love marriage and we got married despite opposition from my family. Things were great between us a year ago. I joined a new company and got carried away by the culture and soon started thinking differently. I found my husband was a typical conservative husband. I discussed my problem with my friends and then decided to divorce my husband. There were friends who advised me to discuss and reconcile matters rather than go to court. I am very clear that I do not want any reconciliation. I have taken a decision to separate and that is final. Dou00a0 I stand to gain through legal process or through reconciliation.
Sapna

Dear Sagar,
If you've decided to go ahead with the divorce then why wonder if you will gain something from it or from reconciliation? The question you have to ask yourself is what do you really want. Divorce of reconciliation? And then go ahead with whatever decision makes more sense and feels right. If you feel that your husband is conservative and you cannot live with a close-minded man, then it's very clear what
you have to do. But if you feel that you still have feelings for him, and that he might change, then give him a chance. It's really how you feel about the situation and how well you are equipped to handle a divorce that's really should be the deciding factor. Don't let waht your friends and family say. It's a decision you have to make. It's your life that will be affected by the decision, so think hard. Take your time and dwell over all the pros and cons. Don't let anyone manipulate you.