Should I be responsible for my schizophrenic wife?

Should I be responsible for my schizophrenic wife?

Illustration/ Satish Acharya

Dear Diana,
I am 28, from Delhi and currently working in Mumbai. I was married five years ago. My wife is suffering from a severe mental illness right from the time of our marriage, initially diagnosed as bipolar disorder by two separate psychiatrists and later as schizophrenia; there being very thin dividing line between the two. In the meantime a daughter was born; she is four now. After being posted to Mumbai, I brought my family to the city. In that time she left home two times. This troubled me a lot. We managed to get her back somehow. I am confused. Knowing the severity of the illness, should I abandon her to her fate or be responsible for her? Could you suggest people who have successful lived with the sufferers of this disease? I am very depressed about my future.
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Name withheld

Dear Friend,
Your child is still young and I'm sure you love your wife enough to have stuck with her for this long. People with bipolar disorders are known to have extreme mood swings and are capable or hurting themselves and others during these attacks of depression. See to it that she takes her medication and don't leave her alone with the child until it is a bit more grown up. Also if things get worse, as it is wont to, over a period of time, do not hesitate to commit her to a good, reputable asylum. Once there, she will be able to deal with her demons under scrutiny and where she won't pose a threat to herself. Think about your child before thoughts of abandoning your wife crop up. Dealing with the sufferer of a mental illness is difficult but not impossible. Be strong.

Two much is bad for health but he won't listen!

Dear Diana,
A married friend is having an extramarital affair. His wife is pregnant and yet, he is having sex with both of them. We have tried to make him see sense but he refuses to listen. Will his health suffer because of this?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
If he is cheating on his pregnant wife and she comes to know, it might affect or even terminate her pregnancy depending on how she takes it. I wonder why his health bothers you? In any case, if he's practising safe sex, he should do just fine. Also, what he's doing is wrong and you should tell him so.

I wanna divorce her because she refuses sex...

Dear Diana,
It's been three years since I married for love. However, over the past year, I've been involved with another girl and we plan to get married. All this happened because my wife has refused to have sex in all this time. I tried to make her understand that this is but a natural progression of our love, but in time I got frustrated and during that time, fell in love with this other girl. The trouble is, how do I tell my wife I want a divorce? Also this gal is very nice, has spoken to her family about me and they have agreed to it. We have also been physical.