Divorced singles reveal deal breakers for them in relationships that never existed before

The data shows these are not unrealistic expectations but rather practical survival skills learned the hard way. The user study was conducted among 5834 active daters who are divorced or separated. Participants ranged in age from 27 to 40 and came from Tier 1, 2, and 3 cities. 

The app's founder and CEO, Ravi Mittal, said, "The study reveals a clear change in mindset about second chances. People are no longer ready to settle or compromise. Second chances have become more about newfound clarity and intentional compatibility. Divorced singles are highly emotionally literate; they know what didn't work, what eventually hurts, and they are making conscious efforts not to repeat the pattern."

Emotional availability is now a non-negotiable
One of the top deal breakers to emerge in the survey is an emotionally unavailable partner. Nearly 44 per cent of women and 32 per cent of men from metros and suburbs shared that they have ignored emotional unavailability before, excusing it as a hectic schedule, preoccupied with office works, and even "we have been married too long;" but they realised that being emotionally available is a choice that can be made even at the busiest of hours and in the longest of marriages. Tarini (35) from Mumbai, said, "Silence is not strength and quietly staying with an emotionally unavailable partner is not doing any good to your mental health or the health of your marriage. I understand that now."

The study reveals that divorced daters are now paying close attention to how people communicate, what they say, how long they take to say it, and how consistent their actions are with their words. Rajeev, 38 year old pediatrician, commented, "For me, slow replies are completely fine. I understand that we are all grown adults, not teenagers with only love to think of. But detachment and inconsistencies are unacceptable. I don't want to do the emotional heavy lifting all alone once again."

Financial transparency
Money might still be an awkward topic for young daters, but daters focused on second chances are more direct about it, calling it an absolutely necessary conversation. 6 in 10 people between 30 and 40 explained that it is not about how much a match earns but understanding how responsible they are with their earnings. Financial secrecy and irresponsibility have become a deal breaker for many second-time daters. 33 year old Samira from Delhi said, "It doesn't mean divorced singles are money-minded. It's just that we know how debt or other secret financial obligations on a partner can affect your life. Understanding spending habits, and to some extent, having an idea of someone's earnings, is honestly practical, no matter what anyone says. I am working; I don't need a provider. But I need someone who's upfront and not spending beyond his capacity for showing off."

"Subtle" disrespect
Almost 31 per cent of female daters above 30 years disclosed facing subtle disrespect in their first marriage, mostly masked as "just a joke" and everyday dismissals. They addressed being talked over often, being cut off mid-conversation, mocking emotions, and brushing off concerns as "you are such an overthinker," and now strictly consider any such behavior as a deal breaker in their renewed attempt to find love. Paromita (38) from Kolkata said, "My threshold for all these has sharply dropped since my divorce. I don't want a man who doesn't think I deserve respect."

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