I'll say don't burst lots of crackers or don't drink and drive this Diwali, and you'll buy this advice, hook, line, and sinker
I'll say don't burst lots of crackers or don't drink and drive this Diwali, and you'll buy this advice, hook, line, and sinker.
In an ideal world where politicians wrote their own speeches and partners came with mute buttons, this would have been indeed possible.
But since it isn't a perfect world and there is corruption, anarchy and alimony, you aren't going to listen to me.
So you'll get behind the wheel drunk and encourage your kids to burst crackers. Also, you are going to buy electronic gadgets, cars, bikes and jewellery on bumper festival discounts. Not to mention that mini food processor which might win you a sedan or a holiday package in a lucky draw in your neighbourhood mela.
At puja, you'll remind deities to intervene in that land deal, and the long-legged neighbour you have your hopes pinned on
And on D-day you'll wake up early or late depending upon last night pre-Diwali gambling bout. Flush the loo twice, waste more water bathing than you usually do, wear clothes you bought by stretching your credit card to a hazardous limit and get on with the celebrations.u00a0
You'll possibly load your children with more arsenal than Russia, giving Afghan warlords a complex. You'll deck up your wife in new jewellery giving Bappi Lahri a complex and decorate your home with lights, robbing the electricity department of thousands of volts in the process.
You'll send out impractical gifts to all business associates you ought to keep happy, and relatives you want to stay away from.u00a0 At the puja, you'll remind Ganesha, Lakshmi, Indra, Kuber and 330 million other deities to intervene in that land deal, business contract, promotion, club-membership, weight loss program and the long-legged neighbour you have your hopes pinned on.
Once the 'traditional' duties are done, that single bottle of Dalmore your cousin got you from Southhall, will be opened only to be gulped down in no time. So, there is no way I can stop you. That's why, for a change, why don't we reverse roles?
You try and tell me that the firecrackers cause high blood pressure, hearing loss and environmental pollution.
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Tell me the 'Right to Sleep' is a fundamental right and the Government of India has banned firecrackers between 10pm and 6am. Advise me not to indulge in hyper consumerism.
Suggest me to feed a dog, give toys to underprivileged kids and a warm shawl to my maid. Warn me to think of the duties towards my family, society and country, which'll cost nothing more than a little thoughtfulness. Do try it, who knows I might listen to you, just for once.
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