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I can't read her mind

Updated on: 29 August,2011 10:26 AM IST  | 
Diana |

I am 28 years old and work as a security officer in an insurance company. A lady insurance agent visits the office often

I can't read her mind

Dear Diana,
I am 28 years old and work as a security officer in an insurance company. A lady insurance agent visits the office often. Sheu00a0 chats with all the guys in the office. I amu00a0 attracted to her. We started with smiling at each other and then talking to each other. We have now become friends. But she is also extremely overfriendly with the others. Once I SMSed her about her behaviour and she stopped talking to me. She would directly interact with the people who mattered and stopped hanging around me. But now she is again back to her old ways of smiling and talking to me. I am confused about her. What is going on in her mind?
-u00a0RHL


Illustration/Satish Acharya

Dear RHL,
You seem to be infatuated with her because she creates a buzz in the office on her arrival. But you are reading too much in her smiling and being friendly with you. It appears that she is of an outgoing personality and loves to chat. You have to understand that she has been talking, smiling with everyone in the office. So it is not that you are her chosen one. May be after you told her she was upset but after a few days got back to herself and started talking to you again. This woman comes to the office purely for work reasons. She is maintaining a happy relationship with everyone.u00a0 Looks like romanceu00a0 is the last on her mind. So get it out of your head. You are no one to dictate terms to her.

My fears are ruining my engagement

Dear Diana,

It is three years since I decided to break my engagement. It was my call as I felt the guy that the elders in my family had chosen was not right for me. I met him a couple of times and there was nothing I could relate to. Now they have found someone else, I have met him and feel comfortable with him. We are to be engaged next month. But why do I still have this nagging fear about him?
-u00a0Rashna

Dear Rashna,
It is you who decided to break off the engagement. I am sure you had your reasons and were convinced about it. Three years later you should have moved on and let it remain the past. You need to look ahead in a positive manner. It seems that you are comparing your ex with this present guy. Stop immediately as it will only cause you distress and anguish. Live for the present and make most of it. Let bygones be bygones. And look forward to your wedding.

My hubby is a control freak

Dear Diana,

My husband is very controlling in the way he treats me. He calls the shots in everything at home. Sometimes it gets veryu00a0 stifling. He tells me he is doing things so that I don't get burdened with more stuff. How do I tell him to relax and not get worked up about every small daily household stuff.
-u00a0LB

Dear LB,
You allowed him to be a control freak because it suited you as you left all the responsibilities to him. You did not feel the need to take charge but now that your husband is overdoing it, you are feeling the heat. Why don't you suggest that household responsibilities be equally divided between you two? In some areas you can take the lead. In this way, he can be less controlling in some areas. Also, explain to him that he needs to relax as it will tell on his health at a later stage.




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