We both seem to have lost interest

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My boyfriend and I have been together for three years and it seems as if our relationship has begun to disintegrate. Neither of us is committed to doing anything to saving it, and I think we are both just waiting for the other person to say that it's time to break up. This makes me sad, but I don't know what to do because I don't think I can bring up the topic of fixing this if I am not in the frame of mind to do any work. It has been like this for over six months, and I am just too tired to have that conversation. He doesn't even say a word about this because I think he is as exhausted as I am. Should we just break up, or does it make sense to work a little more and see if this can be resolved? I don't want to regret not giving it one more chance.
On the one hand, you don't want to regret anything. On the other, you aren't prepared to have a conversation about this, let alone commit to working on saving it. If neither of you wants to take that first step, your relationship is already over, and is only stuck in a state of limbo until one of you calls out its demise. If you want to give it a chance, the least you can do is speak about what's going on. If your boyfriend doesn't acknowledge the problem, and isn't going to carry on that conversation, why are you both torturing yourself by pretending to be together?

Something is going on with my girlfriend and I don't know what to do. She is clearly dealing with some kind of crisis that is affecting her mental health, but she isn't admitting to anything. How can I help her if she won't even tell me what's wrong?
She probably needs time to process something. Tell her you're there for her, whenever she wants to talk, which is all you can do.

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