'She doesn't let me hang out with my friends often'
Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
How can I convince my girlfriend to let me hang out with my friends more often? She thinks I am neglecting her, which is not true, and we fight a lot about this.
Your idea of neglect may be radically different from hers. If she is upset about something, try and understand where that sense of injustice is coming from and try to address it. Don't assume she's being unreasonable just because she doesn't see things your way.
My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now and he recently told me that we should meet just once a fortnight because it makes our relationship stronger. I asked him if he was losing interest in me, but he said he was still in love with me and that this would make us feel more strongly towards each other. He said he needed space because he sometimes felt claustrophobic, and added that meeting less often would make us appreciate each other a lot more. I'm not sure if this makes sense, but he seems very convinced. Should I agree with him?
You will both have different ideas about the kind of space you need, until you find a way of reaching a compromise that makes sense for you. If he feels claustrophobic, it's a sign that something isn't quite right between the two of you, and that there is more to this than just the need for a break. Have you spoken to him about what aspects of this relationship make him feel this way, and if there's anything you can do to make things easier? If you're not happy about meeting him just once a fortnight, you have the right to ask for more time, because relationships are about give and take, not about one person dictating terms that the other person must accept without complaint. Talk about this, because it's the only way you will find a way to arrive at a decision that makes you both happy.
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