Blame it on the hype. I suppose it is a bit churlish to say it but it must hold true when you can put Depp and Jolie in the same sentence and feel the burden of rising expectations and watch them crumble as soon as the two enter the same frame
The Tourist
U/A; Drama/Action
Dir: Florian Henkel Von Donnersmarck
Cast: Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie, Paul Bettany, Timothy Dalton
**
WHAT'S IT ABOUT: Blame it on the hype. I suppose it is a bit churlish to say it but it must hold true when you can put Depp and Jolie in the same sentence and feel the burden of rising expectations and watch them crumble as soon as the two enter the same frame.
Frank Tupelo (Depp) is the kind of tourist you wouldn't accord a second glance to in a place like Venice. Especially, if you're a woman like Elise Clifton-Ward (Jolie). 
He is so plain it's almost funny. Elise, on the other hand, gets all kinds of men tongue-tied and weak-kneed in her very presence. Why pick out Frank to get flirty with on a train to Venice, then?
Sab ek soche-samjhe plan ke mutaabik ho raha hai. To cut a long story short, Elise is the lover of Alexander Pearce, a man wanted by Scotland Yard for tax evasion to the tune of billions of pounds. A man, who has changed his face and the only person with a clue, is Elise.
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Her instructions are simple: lead the cops trailing her every move on a wild goose chase by making them believe that the man she met on a train is Pearce. Frank is the man she picks for the deception.
The cat-and-mouse game continues to its logical or rather dil-logical conclusion.u00a0u00a0
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WHAT'S HOT: It's like being a part of picture postcards. Paris and Venice are such wonderful characters. Wait a minute, they're not characters?
WHAT'S NOT: Actually, Depp and Jolie are. He's known for his eccentric over-the-top performances while she's eye candy on a good day. This movie? Definitely not a good day. Depp makes up for the absence of his trademark charm with a deadpan act, quite unlike anything you've seen since his scissors-for-hands days. Jolie looks a shadow of her former self.
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Motherhood seems to have drained the sexiness out of her. Either that or she must think this is a Tim Burton movie. It takes guts to put two of the highest paid actors together, cast them opposite each other for the first time and f**k it up.
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We get that this film is a remake of a French film (explains the abundance of pregnant pauses). We get that a fish out of water is supposed to be a novelty. What we don't get is how you can shove an absurdly pedestrian plot down our throats and expect us to be good children and gulp it down.
WHAT TO DO: Oh, I don't know, take a walk. The Tourist seems like an unlikely destination, anyway.
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