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Okay with the timepass relationship... everyone ain't

Updated on: 20 August,2009 11:52 AM IST  | 
Diana |

I am 22, he is 26. He stays in Delhi. We're dating. But we won't marry each other. You can call it 'time-pass' if you want.

Okay with the timepass relationship... everyone ain't

Okay with the timepass relationship... everyone ain't

Dear Diana,
I am 22, he is 26. He stays in Delhi. We're dating. But we won't marry each other. You can call it 'time-pass' if you want. The thing is, we both belong to orthodox families. Our families are not in favour of love marriages and we are okay with it. For now, I'm very happy with the way our relationship is headed. I am aware it will affect my future. My friends and cousins are asking me to end the relationship with my boyfriend. According to them, what I am doing is absolutely wrong. What do you think... is what I am doing, wrong?


XYZ


Dear Friend,
You know it won't last and are okay with it. So is he. Not because you don't love him, though. But by your own admission, because your parents and his are orthodox and wouldn't favour a love marriage. What's stopping you from 'arranging' the love marriage? If you don't want this to culminate in a marriage anyway, say so to whosoever's asking. Tell them that what you do with your love life is your problem. That they should leave the right and wrong of your life to you. That you're the best judge of what happens and will be responsible for all screw-ups thereof. That should hold them back.

I ran away from her! Now I wanna run back

Dear Diana,
I lived abroad for a few years. During my last two years there, I met a European girl and fell in love. Due to religious differences and fear of my parents, I could not marry her and came back to India. It's been more than a year now. Our relationship was quite like that of a husband and wife. I miss her every moment and feel like running away from home, I even wrote to her recently that I will marry her irrespective of the religious differences but she seemed to be very hurt and did not respond to my mail. I do not feel like living without her, I love her very much, please advise what do I do? Should I go to Europe to see her personally?u00a0 I want her back anyhow...


CS Jadore

Dear Friend,
A moment of weakness on your part cost you the love of your life. You didn't even think she was worth the battle with your parents. What kind of a lover are you? You could have tried! If you were living-in anyway, wasn't it curt on your part to dump her when she needed you to be strong for her. What's the use of summoning up the courage now after it's way too late. If you're not already back in Europe seeking her out, on your knees, begging her to return home with you, I seriously don't think you deserve her. You don't need someone to tell you what you should do when you break someone's heart. The first impulse is usually the correct one for you.

Will oral sex give me HIV?

Dear Diana,
I've had unprotected oral sex twice (with different sex workers). Is their any chance of contracting HIV in case of oral sex? I am a bit scared. Someone told me that if you have unprotected oral sex, chances are you will. Secondly, does masturbation leads to obesity? I am confused.

Name withheld on request

Dear Friend,
Frequenting sex workers is an open invitation to HIV. Anybody with multiple sexual partners is susceptible to HIV and AIDS for the very simple reason that they do not check if the partner has it. I have no formal training so I won't be able to tell you this for a fact. From what I know, one of the ways to contract HIV + is through unprotected sex. This may include oral sex as there is exchange of bodily fluids. An infection is an infection and if it's something the doctor tells you not to do, and you do it, you're in for trouble. I'd suggest checking with a doctor, though.

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