This Pride month, Sunday mid-day looks at the lives of transwomen who found their real complete identity after undergoing voice change operations
Shivani Gupta, who works as a make-up and mehndi artist. Pic/Nimesh Dave
Everyone who would call Shivani and Payal would address them as “Sir”. The shock would come later at the face-to-face meeting. Despite going through several gender-affirming surgeries, vaginoplasty, hormone therapies, and chest feminisations, there was still something holding them back from being completely female.
“I got my sex change operation done from Delhi. My doctor mentioned that I would need to take hormone medicines before the surgery which I had for 10 months and then got my gender-affirming surgery done. But still, people would give me weird looks and address me as if they are talking to a man. That irritated me and I started researching if changing my voice was possible,” says Shivani Gupta, a transwoman who lives in Andheri.
Recounting a similar experience is Payal Nikumb, another transwoman who hails from Shirpur town of Dhule district in Maharashtra, and got her sex change operation done in Jalgaon. “I looked like a woman, but I wasn’t sounding like one. So, people would not know whether to consider me a girl or a boy. And right from the day I decided that I want to transform into a woman, I had decided that I would change everything — from my appearance to my voice to also being capable of biologically bearing a child. Thus, a few years after my gender-affirming surgeries, I looked for doctors who would help me change my voice,” shares the 29-year-old.
Payal Nikumb worked as a beautician and dancer to save for the surgery. Pic/Special Arrangement
While gender-affirmation surgery has by now become quite common, with many doctors across the country specialising in it, not even a handful of doctors specialise in Wendler’s glottoplasty, the surgery required to feminise a male voice, as hormonal therapy does not change the voice.
“I tried looking for many doctors who would help me with voice change operation. But many could only do the cosmetic part of reducing the size of the Adam’s apple and none of them specialised in giving me a female voice. That was when, luckily, I came across a news article on Voice Surgeon Dr Nupur Nerurkar. I read that she is doing these surgeries at Bombay Hospital in Mumbai and I immediately rushed there,” says Shivani.
New year, new beginnings and new voice — Shivani finally underwent her voice change operation on January 1 this year, which she says, “was the last piece of puzzle left to complete the beautiful frame of femininity”. On the other hand, Payal found out about Dr Nerurkar via YouTube. “There were many videos of her on her channel which gave me the confidence to approach her for the surgery. I visited Bombay Hospital and enquired about her consultation timings, and then told her my wish to get a female voice,” she shares.
The treatment, however, wasn’t an easy process. “In other surgeries it was more of a cut, stitch, heal, and recover. But this surgery was different, mentally as well as physically,” says Shivani.
Shivani and Payal were both asked to strictly quit consuming alcohol and smoking before the surgery. “I had to get a female voice, and I was ready to do whatever was necessary,” says Shivani. They were also asked to give up spicy and oily food, and “avoid shouting or talking loudly”.
“First, I was very scared. I had thoughts like, what if I cannot talk ever? What if I go mute? What if the voice distorts to a level that finally I sound neither like a man nor like a woman? But after Dr Nerurkar explained everything in detail, I gained some confidence and felt ready for the operation,” shares Payal.
D-Day came, both underwent surgery, but the real struggle began after the operation when they had to maintain complete silence. “We had been told prior to the surgery that we could not speak at all for at least three weeks, otherwise our stitches would open,” say both. Payal adds, “I was a very talkative person and used to a lot of mischief and shouting. So, I had to train my mind not to talk. I had reduced talking even before undergoing the surgery so I wouldn’t feel so weird.”
Shivani remarks, “We take many things for granted in life. Regular communication with cab drivers, vegetable vendors, neighbours became next to impossible. I had to write everything to pass on my message and make people understand what I was trying to say. Even now, when I am allowed to speak, it sometimes becomes a problem because I still cannot speak loudly. So it becomes difficult in crowded places or in a lot of traffic,” shares Shivani.
However, being unable to talk led them to become more thoughtful. “The three weeks that I could not talk, I thought about myself. I got time to peacefully embrace my struggles and feel proud about them. I got time to make peace with the fact that despite having no support from my family, I have been able to establish a life for myself and that too without earning money through any wrong or illegal means. Also, it made me more empathetic towards those who are deaf and mute or for that matter towards anyone with any disability,” shares Shivani.
Parents often tell their children, “Creativity will fetch you no money.” However, for both Shivani and Payal who did not have any family support during their gender-affirming surgeries and voice-change operations, it was their creativity itself which came to the rescue. While Shivani saved everything that she earned through her make-up and mehndi appointments along with some modelling assignments, Payal saved money through belly-dancing and other dance shows and by working as a beautician at a parlour.
“No one from the family gave money as they were totally against what I was doing. Also, I did not get any concession for my gender-affirming surgeries in Delhi. I spent nearly R7-8 lakh part-by-part for all sex-change operations and implants. I was left with just a few thousand rupees when I came to Mumbai for my voice change operation. But when I approached Dr Nerurkar, she informed me about the special package at Bombay Hospital where they charged only Rs 20,000 for this surgery. So, after my first consultation, I took up as much work as I could, collected little over the required amount, and got the operation done,” says Shivani.
Sharing her experience, Payal says, “As I had no support from my family, I had gone to Jalgaon for my gender-affirming surgery. I began working as a beautician at a local parlour and began taking up dance shows across India. This way I saved for my surgeries. And slowly and steadily I got my various surgeries done one by one. I have been living in Dubai for the last three years. I have a tie-up with an event management company and I do many shows in the Gulf. And so, I told Dr Nerurkar that I will pay the full amount for my voice change operation so that the hospital can use the money for someone who really cannot afford paying the full bill. So far, I have spent nearly Rs 15 lakh, including Rs 1.5 lakh for my voice-change operation. Now my last wish is to get a uterus implant and gain the most powerful capacity of being a woman — that is of bearing a child. Once I save a good amount, I will get that done too.”
What is Wendler’s glottoplasty?
Explaining the surgery, Dr Nupur Nerurkar, Laryngologist and Head of Voice and Swallowing Centre, Bombay Hospital, says, “This surgery is required in cases of male-to-female trans persons who want to permanently feminise their voice. In cases of female-to-male trans persons, testosterone injections almost always masculinise the voice, so surgery is not needed. A female voice has a higher pitch compared to a male voice.
Dr Nupur Nerurkar. Pic/Special Arrangement
Typically, a man’s voice is around 100 hertz, whereas a woman’s voice is around 200 hertz. So we need to raise the pitch of the sound.” The most common question patients ask is, “Will I sound completely like a woman, or how much similarity in voice will I achieve?” says Dr Nerurkar. This depends on each person’s vocal folds and resonance, she says. “However, one does definitely sound less like a man and more like a woman.”
Dr Nerurkar explains the operation: “The vocal folds are stitched with thin sutures. Once the vocal cord is shortened, the pitch increases.” The procedure has seen massive advancements, she adds. “Earlier surgeries required an incision on the throat, but now we perform it endoscopically. This surgery yields more predictable results and avoids having scars on the patient’s neck,” she adds.
After the surgery
Dr Zainab Nagree. Pic/Special Arrangement
Post-operative therapy of many months, depending on each case, is as crucial a part as the main operation. Explaining this, Dr Zainab Nagree, consultant voice and swallowing therapist at Bombay Hospital, says, “The role of speech therapy is to aid patients’ voice recovery post-surgery. Speech therapy also addresses other aspects, such as resonance, loudness, intonation, pitch range, and stability. The therapist employs a variety of exercises and techniques to achieve this. Vocal exercises facilitate pitch stability and range. However, a feminine voice is not defined solely by pitch; other aspects, including resonance, loudness, and speaking manner, are also important. The speech therapist works on exercises to improve these aspects, targeting a brighter resonance, and more varied and expressive intonation. Loudness drills are conducted for range and volume stability, and some patients require guidance on accent and speaking manner isms.”
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