He only wants the physical side...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My boyfriend is more interested in physical intimacy than in my emotional well-being. When he gets what he wants, he becomes cold and non-communicative. He is not vocal about his life or what he is thinking and only pays attention to me when we are having sex. I am starting to feel disconnected from him because this relationship is not meeting any of my needs, and I don't want to be with someone if it is just purely physical. He says he loves me a lot, but I don't feel the honesty of that statement. He says I am asking for too much and that every relationship takes time to evolve, but it has almost been a year since we began dating and my feelings have not changed. Should I wait for some more time or assume there is nothing more to this and break up?
If a relationship isn't meeting your needs or expectations, and your feelings have not changed or evolved in almost a year, you alone can decide if you want to invest more time and energy in trying to make this work. If it is obvious that you both have different ideas about what is or isn't right about this situation, you should have a conversation about it and make a decision based on whether it can or cannot be resolved. If he isn't willing to acknowledge what you're going through, there isn't much hope for a resolution.

How can I resolve my commitment issues? My girlfriend wants me to make this a more long-term relationship, but I am always worried, and she is threatening to leave me.
It doesn't seem as if you have much of a choice if you both want something different. If you admit to having commitment issues, but aren't willing to work on changing them, you have to be prepared to give up on a relationship with this person. There is no magic solution that can balance these differing needs because she has been clear about what she wants.

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