He wants me to move cities...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I was recently sent on a work trip to another city, where I met a colleague who was very friendly towards me. We chatted a lot and also went out to dinner a few times, after which he continued to stay in touch. We exchanged information and have also been chatting on our personal numbers. A few days ago, he told me he had feelings for me and asked me to consider transferring to his city to see if this could work. I like him a lot, and am tempted to do what he suggests, but I also have a few doubts. On the one hand, this has implications for my professional life because it means we will be together at the same office as well as outside it. Then there is the thought of being on my own in a place where the only person I will know is this guy. It seems like too many risks being taken by me, and none by him. If this doesn't work out, his life will be unaffected because he has nothing much to lose. What should I do? Is it worth the risk?
If you are aware of what the risks are, you're right to compare what each of you stands to lose in the event of it failing. If he really wants this to work, it should be about an equal partnership. Nothing prevents him from coming to your city, for example, unless he has valid reasons that make sense to you. An office romance also leads to complications that you are both unaware of at this point, and which can't be taken lightly. I suggest you give yourself some time to understand where you stand in this arrangement, accept that these are potentially life-altering decisions, and take it slowly until you are on more solid ground. You can both use this time to get to know each other better and take a call on what works a few months down the line when you are more certain.

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