I can’t seem to get past a first date!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 24-year-old woman and have questions about how to make guys interested in me. I meet a lot of them, and have gone on dates a few times, but never seem to get them to ask me out again. It's not as if I am not good-looking or intelligent, but I seem to be doing something wrong on dates, so they just meet me once or twice and then stop calling or messaging. I have asked my friends about this, and they can't think of a reason either. I don't want to get into a relationship with someone if I don't like them, which is what my friends suggest I should do. I'm wondering if they are right and I should accept this compromise. Maybe that way I can find out what I should or shouldn't do in future. Is this a good idea?
If you aren't meeting people who want to go out with you, the thing to do is meet more people. It may be hard to figure out why they stop being interested after a while, but it's also entirely possible that this has nothing to do with you or anything you're doing. Your friends may mean well, but a relationship that isn't built on genuine feelings isn't going to last and may cause more harm than good. One thing you can do is stop being hard on yourself and try enjoying your dates without the pressure of wondering where it might lead. If you treat it as an opportunity to meet someone new and get to know them, you may behave differently and reveal another side to yourself that isn't obvious. Dating doesn't have to lead to anything and accepting that may free you from preconceived notions as well as unnecessary pressure.

My boyfriend struggles to be physically intimate with me, and this makes me wonder if it's my fault. What should I do?
Don't blame yourself. Give him time to figure this out on his own and ask more questions.

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