She moved on even before our divorce!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I have been married for 11 years and we have a daughter who is 9. Due to some family issues, my wife took my daughter and left, before applying for divorce. The matter is still in court. I recently found out that she has been having affair and is now staying with that person. What do I do?
- Louis N
You should consider speaking to your lawyer about your options because, as you point out, the matter of divorce is still in court. Ask about what her decision to move in with someone means, and how it affects your case, if at all.

My boyfriend and I have been thinking of ending our relationship because we finish all dates by arguing and it has started to feel as if we aren't compatible in any way. This wasn't how things were between us when we began dating and I can't figure out if one of us did something wrong. I want to work things out because I feel as if we may still be able to save this but can't think of what I can do. Should we give up without even trying?
This depends entirely upon whether the two of you want to save this relationship. Have you tried asking him if he knows where things started to go wrong, or if he feels the same way you do? Anything can be saved if you both want it badly enough. You wanting to save it on your own won't work simply because he is responsible for how things turn out too. Talk about what you both want before thinking about what you can do to pull it off.

How do I speak to a girl I have a crush on? She makes me nervous, and I always go away after saying hello, which is embarrassing.
You can start by trying to think of her as someone you want to be friends with. This involves a conversation about simple things. Only familiarity can help make you feel more comfortable.

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