Wondering if this is what he is really like

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 21-year old woman and have been dating a guy who is the same age and belongs to my class in college. He recently asked me to consider getting into a relationship with him, and I told him I needed time to think about it because I wanted to get to know him a little better first. This conversation happened two weeks ago. Since then, he has been a little distant and doesn't engage in any chatting unless I reach out first. He doesn't message on WhatsApp anymore unless I ask him how he is doing. My friends say he is just giving me time and space until I figure things out, but I think this is childish and a sign of what he's really like. He's a great guy though, so I am also worried because I don't want to let go of him by reading some wrong signals or misunderstanding him. What should I do?
You should go with what your instinct tells you because you will be increasingly amazed at how accurate it can be as you get older. Your friends may have a point, but so do you. If you have doubts, ask him to explain his behaviour directly and clarify if he is indeed keeping his distance out of respect. If you think he is being childish, consider the possibility of him being less mature than you are, and the possibility of him learning to be better. Ultimately, it depends upon how well you get to know him and how the bond between you two strengthens or weakens. The only way that will happen is with time. If you like him, tell him you would like to meet more often to help you reach a decision. If he likes you too, he shouldn't have a problem with that. As for losing a great guy, the two of you are both 21. Unnecessary pressure is the easiest way to kill a relationship before it has even begun, so go easy on yourself.

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