My boyfriend's house stinks!

Updated: 05 September, 2020 04:13 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I don't think I am a petty person, but this really bothers me.

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

DR LOveMy boyfriend and I have a great relationship except for one problem. His home is always dirty and messy. It smells. I don't know how to tell him this because it can come across as insulting, but he doesn't even notice it. I don't think I am a petty person, but this really bothers me. I try and find excuses to avoid meeting him if he ever calls me to his place. How do I deal with this? I know it's not a big problem, but I take cleanliness seriously.

Problems don't always start out big. If you can't tell him why cleanliness is important to you, and why you avoid meeting him at home, how will your relationship evolve if the two of you ever decide to move in together? Will you withhold this information if he brings his habits home? Telling someone to keep their home clean isn't being petty; it's common sense. If we all took cleanliness more seriously, India would be a better place to live in. I suggest you talk to him, tell him why you don't mean to sound insulting, and ask if he is prepared to try and change. Explain why this can affect the future of your relationship. If he is serious about you, he should make an effort to show it.

I don't think I love my boyfriend as much as he loves me, which makes me feel very guilty at times. I know I will end up dumping him when I find someone I like better. What do I do? I don't want to break his heart, but I can't fake this enthusiasm.

If you don't want to be with him, the sooner you end it, the better it will be for you both. A relationship built on lies or fake assurances isn't going to last. You will end up breaking his heart anyway, but that pain will only be harder for him to handle if you continue making him feel as if you care. Please be honest.

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First Published: 05 September, 2020 04:13 IST

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