I am 18, my sister is 17
Dear Diana,
I am 18, my sister is 17. I think my sister's boyfriend is cheating on her. He already had a girlfriend and my sister knew this. However, she has no problems with that girl. I think he never makes an effort to understand my sister.
She is busy studying these days and doesn't receive his calls, so he starts shouting at her. My sister cannot even go out anywhere with my parents without "his permission". She is also not allowed to go to any of her girl friends' houses. Most of the time, they argue over trivial things and past occurrences. He is a year older than her. How can I save my sister from him or make my sister understand what kind of a person he is?
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
First things first. You're an elder sibling and are well within your rights to be worried aboutu00a0 who your sister is seeing. He doesn't seem the ideal type at all. What is more disturbing is that your sister is okay with her guy's two-timing. She owes him no explanations. She doesn't need his permission to do what she wants.
u00a0
It's her life and if anyone gets to curtail her rights and privileges, it's her (and your) parents for as long as she's under their roof. Moreover, he can't expect her to be at his beck and call and pander to his whims and fancies. He's your age. Confront him and put him in his place.
Put the fear of God in him and tell him that if he ever treats your sister badly, you'll make him pay. When he knows that her sibling is looking out for her, he'll stop being so idiotic. Your sister may not listen to you about letting this guy go. The least you can do is ensure that he doesn't hurt her in any way.
I don't want her talking to her new friend!
Dear Diana,
I am 22, she is 22. We've been together three and a half years now. When I asked her not to talk to her new friend, she says she likes him and can't do without talking to him. I don't like all this one bit!
Name withheld
Dear Friend,
Why are you so insecure? She might have great conversations with him but bottomline is: she's with you and not with him. Why can't you let this go? Don't let her see that it's affecting you. If there's reason to doubt her, tell her to choose: him or you.
Where has my friend gone?
Dear Diana,
She called me up the evening of April 26. Her cell phone has been switched off since. She was supposed to get married in June. She shares every single detail of her life with me. Her sudden unavailibility is worrying. Her father is very strict.
u00a0
I have full faith in her mother that she will do nothing to her. What should I do? Because of this, I can't concentrate on my work and on my personal life even though we are not in a relationship, I care for her very much. What should I do? Please help me out.
Sarvesh
Dear Friend,
Why would you be unduly worried? Are you expecting something bad to happen? If yes, why? I guess you should wait this one out andu00a0 hope her parents will "do nothing to her".
Though why they would, is really unclear. If she's getting married in June, they probably wouldn't want her talking to male friends (if they're old-fashioned) and it's probably nothing to worry about. If you care, call up and tell her parents that you are calling in because you haven't heard from her in a long time and are worried if she's okay. Leave it at that if they insist you not call back anymore.
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