Lack of communication can derail any relationship after a point, but you should consider whether you both see this as a problem, and whether you are both committed to fixing it, before you make any decision
Illustration/Uday Mohite
My boyfriend and I have been together for around five months, and I have noticed that he can’t stop staring at women. He stares at them for more than a few minutes and can’t seem to help himself. I asked him why he does this, and he said he couldn’t help it because pretty women distract him. I don’t know if this is a disrespectful comment or an honest one, and if I should just ignore it because it doesn’t harm me in any way. At the same time, I feel as if I should ask him to stop because I don’t think I am comfortable being with someone who behaves in this manner. I love him a lot, but I don’t want to let that become an excuse for him to get away with anything. What should I do?
You should tell him to stop, not only because it bothers you but because it’s unacceptable behaviour. One of the things all women complain about when they visit India is how they struggle with the attention of men. There is an inability to acknowledge and respect a woman’s space and it’s not okay for anyone to assume that staring is okay just because it appears to cause no harm. It may not affect you directly, but there is a person being stared at, for no apparent reason, just because your boyfriend can’t control himself. Tell him why this is disrespectful to all women, not just you, and ask him to learn some manners before he decides to get into any relationship. If he can’t amend his ways, this isn’t someone capable of being in a relationship built on mutual respect.
I have serious communication issues with my partner and don’t know how to get through to him. Should I end this relationship?
Lack of communication can derail any relationship after a point, but you should consider whether you both see this as a problem, and whether you are both committed to fixing it, before you make any decision.
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