Dr love with mid-day: He has a problem with my age!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I recently met a great guy at a party, and we had a lot of fun. We exchanged numbers and began chatting, but he stopped when he found out that I am six years younger than him. I don't get it because I thought we were compatible and I was looking forward to meeting him again. I want to go on a date and give him an opportunity to get to know me better instead of judging me for something so superficial, but it may be a barrier I can't cross. How do I fix this?
You may be right about compatibility, but you may also be correct in thinking of this as an insurmountable barrier. Him changing his mind is only a possibility when he is open enough to give this an opportunity. If he isn't chatting, he isn't interested in exploring this, and you may have no choice but to accept that. All you can do is ask for an explanation, tell him why you think you should meet again, and hope he responds. If he doesn't, it's also disrespectful, and a sign that this isn't someone willing to be open-minded about things. That should also tell you about the kind of person he is and make you reconsider what you hope to accomplish by getting to know him.

Is it normal to only be attracted to older men? I don't know if this is a sign that I have some unresolved issues, but I sometimes worry that I'm not like my friends when it comes to the people I date. Should I speak to a therapist about this?
It's sometimes hard to explain why we like someone because there are multiple factors at work. Age may be one, but there may also be a need for stability, maturity, or intelligence driving those decisions. If you want to try and understand yourself better, speak to a therapist by all means, but don't be too hard on yourself if a relationship is giving you what you need.

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