Feel like giving up on dating...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I have been single for two years since my last relationship ended. Since then, I get compliments all the time, but they are never from guys I genuinely like. It feels as if they say this just because they want to go out on dates with me, not because they want to consider a serious or genuine relationship. I have tried dating apps and also gone on dates that my friends have set up for me, but it is shallow and casual, and I end up feeling as if I am constantly wasting my time. I am close to giving up on the whole thing. Am I doing something wrong?
You're looking for something meaningful while the people you're meeting are not. This is more a mismatch of expectations than a sign that you're doing something wrong. Clarity about what you want is critical and shouldn't be dismissed because it means you're not going to waste time on something that doesn't matter. The only way forward is to keep meeting people though, not shying away from it, because that is the only way you can express what you want until you find someone who wants the same things. If online dating and being set up feels like failed endeavours, be upfront on your profile and tell your friends what you're looking for, so they make better matches. Also, it's possible that some people just need time to figure out what they want, so a little patience may help too.

There is a girl I really like but she says she is not over her ex-boyfriend yet. She won't go on dates but still flirts with me. What should I do?
If she is flirting with you, she likes you and just needs to deal with the end of her last relationship. She has made this clear too. If you really like her, why not give her time and space to understand what she wants, and let her know that you're willing to wait? She will appreciate the honesty.

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