She’s scared of meeting my family

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My girlfriend and I want to take a trip to my family's home in another city, but she is nervous because my parents don't really approve of our relationship. There have been some phone calls between them, and she gets the sense that they are dismissive of her and don't want me to be with her. I know this is a problem, but I believe it is only by meeting her in person that they can get a better sense of who she is and why I want to be with her. Her problem is it may backfire, and we may end up damaging our relationship if she can't cope. I agree with her but it's a risk I am willing to take. If my parents behave badly with her, I am prepared to leave sooner and come back to avoid any problems between us. She is still reluctant though, and I don't want to force her. Should I just drop the idea of the trip? If I do, it will only increase the rift between her and my family. How do I fix this?
Trying to make it work is a sensible approach, because no one here - not you, your girlfriend, or family - know what will happen when you all meet in person. They may change their minds about each other or become more entrenched in their views. Either way, it is definitely worth taking a risk for because you can then say you tried and failed. Being prepared to leave early is also a safeguard that should reassure your girlfriend. We can't always escape from difficult situations, and what may convince your girlfriend to give this a chance is the fact that these issues often test the strength of a relationship and can help bring you both closer to each other. Yes, there is always the possibility that you may argue, or your parents may make things worse, but these obstacles are good for personal development because they help you navigate tricky situations better in future.

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