18 August,2026 12:27 PM IST | Mumbai | Dr Love
Illustration/Uday Mohite
My girlfriend is always stressed and there's nothing I can do to help. I try to distract her by taking her out and trying to convince her that things will change for the better, but nothing works because her personal and professional life are both challenging in many ways. This has had an effect on our relationship, too, because spending time with her doesn't relax me in any way. I always have to be patient and hear her out, and I'm happy to play that role, but it sometimes seems one-sided and unfair. It feels as if I can't complain about my life because of how much worse her situation is. Does this mean we don't stand a chance at making this work if nothing changes for the better?
If it's unfair and you feel as if you can't talk about yourself, that has to be addressed even if you think it's not the right thing to discuss. Everyone has problems and the point of any successful relationship is the ability to share a burden. You can be patient and supportive, but it can't be an indefinite role because that can turn to resentment at some point. Speak to her about reaching out to a therapist or looking for better coping mechanisms. Explain that trying to make her feel better can sometimes be difficult for you because it affects your mental health too. This doesn't necessarily mean your relationship is doomed, but it's definitely something that can't be ignored because the situation won't change without active involvement and a shared desire to fix things.
I broke up with my girlfriend and don't know what to tell my family because there was no real reason. We just drifted apart but they were very fond of her. What should I say?
Why say anything but the truth? They may have been fond of her, but a relationship is managed only by the people in it. Why try to come up with an excuse when it doesn't serve any real purpose?
The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com