I hate the label of being ‘late’

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I'm a software engineering student with just one problem. One of my friends completed his software engineering degree before me and has a decent job. Most of my other friends are married and settled but, due to family issues, I began late and am still studying. People always tell me I am ‘late in life' and this shames me. Even my parents think I am late for my career, marriage, and a decent life. I am losing hope because everyone is demotivating me. I want some positive motivation to grow. What should I do? - RS
You alone can define when the time is right for anything, given that no one else is in a position to understand your circumstances. It is unfortunate that your parents don't see this from your perspective, but the way forward is to put your head down and set yourself small goals. Education, marriage, and family are all stepping stones, and it is sometimes overwhelming to think of it all as a prerequisite to what society calls a successful life. I suggest you stick to just one goal for the year and believe that there is a time and place for everything. As for motivation, if you cannot find it within yourself to rise above these expectations set by others, you should consider meeting people who are more supportive. The ones you are with are clearly not doing you any favours.

My boyfriend says he will never marry me, which undermines my confidence in myself. How do I convince him to change his mind?
If you aren't good enough for him, why does he want to be with you? And if he doesn't respect you enough to commit to something you are interested in, why aren't you putting yourself and your interests first? If this relationship isn't going where you would like it to, the sensible thing to do is evaluate whether it is right for you to stay with this person.

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