Should I cut all ties with my ex?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My ex-boyfriend, who is still in touch with me, has been helping me find a job. My current boyfriend is not happy with this at all, and it has caused a lot of issues between us. I have tried to make him understand that this is purely professional, but it's not worth the hassle if we just fight about it. I am considering cutting all ties with my ex because I know my boyfriend can't handle it. Is this a sign that he is immature or possessive, and does it mean I should not commit to a long-term relationship with him? We have been together for a year, and I love him a lot, but this reaction has come as a surprise and I'm not sure what I should think.
If he can't handle you being in touch with an ex, it is immaturity as well as insecurity on display. It has a lot to do with how he feels about this relationship, and it may not be a red flag as much as a sign that the two of you need to work on building trust. Someone who is secure in a relationship will not let a friendship, or professional relationship, get in the way. If he can't handle it and refuses to accept that this is about your well-being, it needs to be called out and worked upon. You don't need to commit to anything until you feel secure, and that can only happen with time and being able to have difficult conversations. Given that it has been a year, you can simply avoid your ex until things improve, and gauge how your boyfriend treats you. If you get closer to each other, and he can arrive at a place where he won't feel threatened by your past, it is a sign that your relationship has the potential to go the distance. Don't let this incident determine your future because you may simply need to get to know each other better before making any serious commitments.

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