He is forcing me to accept his proposal

Illustration/Uday Mohite

A few weeks ago, I told my boyfriend that I needed more time to decide if we should marry. We have been together for three years and he has been mentioning it a lot, but I have put it off because I have concerns about our financial condition, as well as about differences in temperament between the two of us. He seems to think that these things will get resolved if we commit to marriage, but I think that's a fantasy because we aren't doing anything to resolve how I feel. He says he will have to break up with me if I don't commit soon, and that only makes me feel like I am being forced into something. Should I end this and risk losing someone who is very important to me?
You have both been clear about what you want and are adults with minds of your own. If you are not comfortable with the idea of marriage, you're right to not commit because this is a life-altering decision that cannot be taken lightly. If your boyfriend believes your fears aren't serious, that is a problem because it reveals a refusal or inability to treat you with the respect you deserve. It is also a red flag, even if his intentions may be good. You may always worry about losing him, but you have to put yourself and your interests first because, without that, there may come a time when you start to question your decision about staying in a relationship that only brings you pain. If he isn't willing to give you time, you both have the prerogative of ending this if there is no consensus on what the future looks like.

Is it okay to be with someone if we have nothing in common but he still makes me laugh?
That depends upon whether laughter alone is enough for you to want to be with him. There are other things to look for when it comes to strong relationships, so think about them too.

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