Would living in spoil things for us?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I have been wondering about the possibility of a live-in relationship with my boyfriend. We have been together for a long time, but neither of us is thinking about marriage at the moment. My worry is that living together may cause more harm than good, because our current arrangement works very well. We have our individual space, and like the idea of being able to go back to our homes. At the same time, I understand that living together may bring us closer and deepen this relationship in some way that I don't understand yet. Should I risk it for a while and see what happens? If this doesn't work out, I will be heartbroken because we may not be able to go back to how things were.
Have you both spoken about why you want to live together? Being happy with the way things are also means you don't necessarily want change that may be painful. Yes, there will be challenges because it's not easy to simply accept someone else in your personal space, but there are advantages too if you are both aware of what you want from this relationship. There's no need to be afraid if you can discuss your reasons for wanting this, as well as what you fear might happen.

The person I am casually dating has become increasingly clingy and I don't know how to handle it. When we got together, we were clear about this relationship and didn't want anything serious, but she seems to have changed her mind and is now demanding more from me. Should I end this?
If it's obvious that you are both looking for different things, continuing only complicates this situation. If you have been clear about what you want and this doesn't work or her, you are both heading towards a conflict. There's nothing wrong with her wanting more, but if you are no longer compatible, the sooner you come clean and end this, the easier it will be for you both to move on.

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